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The Other Side of the Story – A Break Before Judgement, Generalisation and Jumping to Conclusions.


She cut you short. He cut you off in traffic. She’s a bitch. He’s a son-of-a-bitch. He gave you the finger. They never returned your calls. He’s just another lowlife loser. She’s just another stingy scrooge. She was rude, abrupt, inconsiderate. You got the cold shoulder. He never showed up and never bothered to cancel. She hung up on you. He left you out in the rain. She never came through for you. They just don’t care.


Their so-not-how-you-would-have-handled-it behaviour may have ruffled your feathers, disappointed, hurt, confused or downright shocked you. And you may never know the why behind it. And maybe, just maybe, it doesn’t matter. Because maybe, just maybe, they’re carrying a pain that blinds them, a secret that shames them, or a dream that defies the current facts of their life.

Maybe, just maybe, what you see is not all there is to see. Twitter Bird Icon: Neshika's Tweetable


Maybe, just maybe:
: she’s experienced loss that’ll take this entire incarnation to come to terms with.
: he just got the worst news imaginable and is thinking about all he has to lose.
: they have nothing left to lose.

Maybe, just maybe:
: she’s afraid to go home.
: he’s rushing home to pick up the pieces.
: they no longer have a place to call home.

Maybe, just maybe:
: her aching heart is with her kid who she knows is being bullied on the playground right now.
: they’re haunted by the things they did, and the things they wish they had done.
: the events of their existence are splintered by unspeakable things.
: their minds are preoccupied with making ends meet.
: his spirit is worn out from being the strong one.
: something important called them away.

Maybe, just maybe:
: every day she hides the doubt she has about her decisions, wondering why the road she’s chosen is so hard to walk, all the while wishing she was further along than she is.
: this is a short-term gig – the road he’s walking to where he wants to be.
: before they were here, they were some place brighter.

Maybe, just maybe:
: their outward “no” is an internal “yes” to the boundaries they wish they’d defined sooner.
: he feels trapped and doesn’t want to be here, doing this, anymore.
: in that moment, they felt helpless, hopeless, worthless.
: they long to be heard, held, loved, set free.
: she feels like a fraud – all the time.

And maybe, just maybe, today is proving to be especially tough, and they’re doing all they can not to fall apart.

Shelve judgements + generalisations.
Brake before jumping to conclusions.
In the face our disappointment in others, a refrain from harsh criticism can be a colossal act of compassion.

There’s a story behind every story.

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